Esther Perel

Otrohet har existerat ända sedan tvåsamheten uppfanns, liksom den skamfyllda stämpel som otroheten bär med sig. En otrohetsaffär kan innebära slutet för ett par, ja, den kan utmana hela deras identitet. Hur ska vi förhålla oss till detta så laddade tabu? Trots denna så vanliga mänskliga erfarenhet, är otrohet som företeelse så lite utforskad på djupet.

Vad menar vi egentligen när vi pratar om otrohet? Varför drabbar den även lyckliga förhållanden? Kan man älska mer än en person samtidigt? Kan man gardera sig mot otrohet i ett förhållande? Och kan den till och med leda till något gott?

Esther Perel har träffat hundratals par som upplevt otrohet. Svek gör ont och ger djupa sår, men det är möjligt att läka. En affär kan även öppna för ett nytt och djupare förhållande. Otrohet är en livsomskakande erfarenhet som rör vid vårt allra innersta och får oss att se på kärlek och lust på ett nytt sätt.

Rakt, insiktsfullt och underhållande utforskar Perel hur vi lever tillsammans. Kärlekskris - Gå vidare efter otrohet utmanar våra föreställningar kring kärlek och begär.

Esther Perel skriver om det som tycks vara ett av vår tids vanligaste relationsproblem: sex. Eller snarare: bristen på sex.

Bokens fallbeskrivningar och resonemangen kring dem visar olika förhållanden - gamla, unga, homo- och heteropar, gifta, sambor, par med eller utan barn där paret av olika anledningar inte längre har sex med varandra. De vill fortsätta sitt liv tillsammans, de vill inte göra slut och gå vidare med någon annan partner. Det de vill är att återupptäcka lusten till varandra.

Det finns inga enkla lösningar och inte heller ett svar som passar alla. Ett återkommande mönster syns dock, nämligen att man i ett parförhållande kan komma varandra för nära, så att den sexuella spänningen försvagas när inga okända sfärer längre finns. Man vet allt om varandra och har inget eget utrymme kvar. Syret tar slut, sexlusten slumrar in.

Genom att belysa detta specifika problem inom parförhållanden och visa olika vägar att hantera det ger författaren olika förslag och möjligheter i denna insiktsfulla och läsvärda bok.

A New York City therapist examines the paradoxical relationship between domesticity and sexual desire and explains what it takes to bring lust home.One of the worlds most respected voices on erotic intelligence, Esther Perel offers a bold, provocative new take on intimacy and sex. Mating in Captivity invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.Drawing on more than twenty years of experience as a couples therapist, Perel examines the complexities of sustaining desire. Through case studies and lively discussion, Perel demonstrates how more exciting, playful, and even poetic sex is possible in long-term relationships. Wise, witty, and as revelatory as it is straightforward, Mating in Captivity is a sensational book that will transform the way you live and love.

One of the world''s most respected voices on erotic intelligence, Esther Perel offers a bold, provocative new take on intimacy and sex. Mating in Captivity invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.Drawing on more than twenty years of experience as a couples therapist, Perel examines the complexities of sustaining desire. Through case studies and lively discussion, Perel demonstrates how more exciting, playful, and even poetic sex is possible in long-term relationships. Wise, witty, and as revelatory as it is straightforward, Mating in Captivity is a sensational book that will transform the way you live and love.

"A fresh look at infidelity, broadening the focus from the havoc it wreaks within a committed relationship to consider also why people do it, what it means to them, and why breaking up is the expected response to duplicity but not necessarily the wisest one.LA Review of BooksFrom iconic couples therapist and bestselling author ofMating in Captivity comesa provocative and controversial look at infidelity with practical, honest, and empathetic advice for how to move beyond it.An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboouniversally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheateven those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book.For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. Anaffaircan even be the doorway to a new marriagewith the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart.Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationshipswhat we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations.Fiercely intelligent,TheStateofAffairsprovides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.

When you love someone, how does it feel? And when you desire someone, how is it different? In Mating in Captivity, Esther Perel looks at the story of sex in committed couples. Modern romance promises it all - a lifetime of togetherness, intimacy and erotic desire. In reality, it's hard to want what you already have. Our quest for secure love conflicts with our pursuit of passion. And often, the very thing that got us to into our relationships - lust - is the one thing that goes missing from them. Determined to reconcile the erotic and the domestic, Perel explains why democracy is a passion killer in the bedroom. Argues for playfulness, distance, and uncertainty. And shows what it takes to bring lust home. Smart, sexy and explosively original, Mating in Captivity is the monogamist's essential bedside read.

***NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER*** Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Why do people cheat? Can an affair ever help a marriage?Infidelity is the ultimate betrayal. But does it have to be? Relationship therapist Esther Perel examines why people cheat, and unpacks why affairs are so traumatic; because they threaten our emotional security. In infidelity, she sees something unexpected - an expression of longing and loss. A must-read for anyone who has ever cheated or been cheated on, or who simply wants a new framework for understanding relationships.'Esther Perel does nothing short of strip us of our deepest biases, remind us of our purpose in connecting as lovers, and save relationships that might otherwise sink into the sea-all with even-handed wisdom, fresh morality, and wise prose. Thank heavens for this woman.' - Lena Dunham'Beautiful. A brilliantly intelligent plea for complexity, understanding, and - as always - kindness.' - Alain de Botton'She's the guru on relationships... she's the first person I ask for advice' - Cara Delevingne'Wisest sex therapist we ever did meet. Her new book, THE STATE OF AFFAIRS, proposes a new perspective on infidelity' - GRAZIA'This is a must-have for all married couples and has completely changed my thinking.' - SUNDAY TIMES STYLE